well. without being too dramatic i will go over what has been happening.
mrs. vasa, you are too quick! i deleted my last post about this subject but its back, basically.

okay. well.
i might not be going to alabama.
and by might not i mean that there is a real good chance.

why? oh money. why now? i thought everything was set and then the financial aid came in and it was like nothing, litterally. and so we waited a bit and my dad lost his job as like a biologist guy and then we sent in an income reduction form and yesterday morning they said we couldn't get anything else.

i dont think ive ever cried so much and it was hard to focus on my final after the news and it ruined my day and today seems a bit better. my friends were absolutly fantastic and invited me over and we all sat and talked and made plans for the future and im still pretty shaken up but my friends are the best in the world.

im pretty scared for the future. i will be sitting on white foldy chairs alongside all these kids who know where they are going and if they dont/are not going anywhere, they know what they'll do. i dont know if im going to college in NJ or college at all, and thats pretty rough to type.
BREAK: this is all very moany and moapy, but this is my blog. ahhaha
UNBREAK: im the kind of person who likes stability. im the kind of person who likes family tradition, so alabama was perfect. i used to be so against it but the moment i knew i wanted to go there was in NYC at the alabama alumni christmas party and my family was there and we were talking to the alumnis and this one man, a president of some corporation and the alumni club, was talking to me and told me "see this pin (a little A for alabama), i've had this pin for years and i wear it to all the games. i want you to have it" and he just popped it off and gave it to me. i so badly wanted to go there. i still want to go there. but if i do go there, my parents will be in debt. and that is not good.

im going to try to have a good day. its my last as being something/somewhere and stable.
great, im crying again.


  1. Well, you seem to think that this is a forever event. The kind of person you are, this is not the end of your opportunity. When I sit at these graduations, I think "Yeah, they all act like every one of these students is going somewhere." Baloney. Cruel, but true. Many of them have great opportunities and make nothing of them. Then there are those like you who make the best of everything and are made to do great things but you think it's all gone. But you stay home for a bit, the family saves money and you are there for mom and dad - because they will benefit from you being home for them. Then, when things are better, you go to Alabama. Is the school going out of business? No. It's like Millie going to NJCU. Sure, MICA and UArts want her. But we're not all made of money. But MICA knows reality and will not ban Millie from going there when the money is there. I doubt Alabama will ban you from going there. And your friends are the best out there because they don't judge you based on where you go to school.
    You are not moany and mopey. You're disappointed and bummed. But a lot of people are having a tough time right now. Heck, many countries don't force their graduates to go to college right away. Brits do the "gap year" where they volunteer and travel. You and Matty should go to Italy together, travel, take pictures, record it, blog, youtube it and you two will be famous! Who can beat you two charming sassy people on a world adventure! Hope you are having fun post-graduation.

  2. darling! i know what a bunch of bullshit "financial aid" is in the states. but like vasa said, nothing is going to stop an amazing girl like you from getting the education of her dreams. FAFSA is only the tip of the iceberg for federal aid in the states. the gov't is still sponsoring three types of federal student loans, and most banks still have private student loans, too. there are SO many options for you, please don't think it's the end! the more time you have to plan for a stable and secure (not to mention financially affordable!) future, the better. also, you'd be surprised at the amount of learning and growing that you can do out of school when you can't be in it. i know it's scary and daunting to think about loans and banks and tuition and what not, but you can do it! you make the most of everything katherine, and that's why i know you'll succeed even though times are tough right now. stay strong and stay focused and everything will fall into place. you know i'm here for you if ya need to talk at all! luv ya girl.

  3. ms vasa's post is beautiful and so true.

    and i agree.. wherever you go, i know you'll make the most of it. meet everyone and take every opportunity presented to you and you'll be exactly where you've always wanted to be in 4 years.