okay okay okay

so its time that i began really doing what i want to do with this blog.

a little background info:
michelle got me hooked by taunting me with the possibility of making a daily fashion blog. I LIKED IT. I GOT HOOKED. ... IDIDNTDOIT. oops.

alright this is plan ladies and gents.
this blog will now contain photos of me/my "style" and little writings and thoughts ... confessions if you will? HUH HUH? okay.

so let me clean my room first and make it presentable to all you 7 followers i have. and then, let the flood gates open!

i just watched a program about illegal body snatching. SO INTERESTING. this reminded me of how much i want to attend the Bodies exhibit. the only thing i would have to do would be to distance myself from the realization that they were actually, living and breathing human beings that walked around and cried and wanted to be touched. Humans facinate me. Our bodies facinate me. Not enough to become a doctor, mind you, but just enough to look from a safe distance and admire. (Not like a creeper?) Did you ever think of how we work? I know there are scientific names and facts that lay it all out but just think. My brain is sending messages to the nerves and joints and tendons in my fingers that make them move left to right and up and down, and i'm not even out of breath. i'm sure i just butchered that process up, but just go ask michelle how it works. I am so interested in how we take deep breaths and how they calm us down and how we feel better after a nice, long, deep, breath. i love it. Have you ever had your thumb uncontrollably flinching. hecticly thinking "I DONT WANT THIS TO HAPPEN!!!!" but there it is and you cant stop it. have you ever thought about cancer? how our bodies are so advanced that sometimes our own bodies have mutations and we dont even notice them because they assimilate into our bloodstreams or bone marrow or tissue. OH MY. its just facinating how we work. how we grow hair to heat our bodies and with clothing, we have learned that we dont need that much hair and then its just gone. or how our thumbs grip and clench and make our lives a heck of a lot easier in the food department. I see you moving your hand there! its wonderfully interesting as well as replusive, yes? what about how we eat. i could go for days on this! we eat a cheezit. it slides down to the stomach. it gets all decomposed. we take all we can out of it. (can we take anything from it? calcium perhaps?) the watery stuff is out one tube. the thicker stuff is out another. we eat another cheezit. cycles. we are, as i read in a poem, meat and bone. our corneas are worth 6000 doll hairs. our entire, intact body is worth 250000 doll hairs. and here were are trying to make a living ourself. trying to sneak a couple of cookies at night, drinking 5 glasses of water, because 8 glasses - no even 7 glasses - make you feel sick and we dont want a rerun like last time, do we?, and here we are watching TCM and the news and reading and walking and snapping pictures and accidently cutting our fingers on that darn thick plastic that so many things seem to be wrapped in these days. trying to get by. trying to catch the sunrise. trying to get to bed before 12 (HA). trying to enjoy our short time on earth. wondering whats after that but not really thinking it fully though because it really is mindboggling. oh well. so what am i saying? well: reach for the carrot instead of the chipsahoy. read that book you've been wanting to. todays the day to finally wear that slightly out-there outfit. dont wait for anything. do not save anything. because before you know it, you'll be in some black bag being chopped up and illegally sold to wannabe medical students. live on!

EDIT: so i said this on my facebook and im worried someone will think its some poppy song lyric, but its from me! i googled it! anyway, besides me being paranoid, i thought it fit here:

"I can move things with my mind, like my arms"

Boy am I excited for the Altered Book Project. I just spent the last like ... hour or two outlining it all out, all the things I want to happen, all the materials I need, the questions I need to ask, the lyrics I will use and where to find a nice thick book!

AHHHH! I AM SO EXCITED. this is the best feeling.

Must Be 500 Hundred Degrees!

I can't seem to not be talking about Prom. I find it to be so stressful. Is it really worth it? I need to find a dress that I won't look ridiculous in. I need to find a date (me asking someone, dear sweet good gravy). I have to do all this thinking about hair and shoes and nails and AM I TAN ENOUGH? this is insane. I'll tell you what I think will happen. I will not have the courage to ask someone, anyone, no one! and I'll either go alone or not go at all. I do want to go though, like its a high school staple, and I do want someone to ask me. Is that childish? To still hope for that perfect prom? Boy, am I a valley girl. I mean, jeez louise, what am I going to do?
Its 2 AM and I'm typetypetyping away, spilling my true feelings. I wish this was easier. I hope everything turns out surprisingly okay but soon. JEEZ. NOTHING WILL TURN OUT OKAY, WILL IT?






ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. nuts.

hey.

i just googled this blog and i found it.

i'm the first thing that comes up after you hit SEARCH.

thats right, originality.



i just remembered eating chipotle in the rain in michelle's new house/porch.
do you remember that michelle? i got you wendy's as a house warming gift. ahaha.

hungry humans, we've got to eat some of them.

i really like driving. sure it's a death trap wrapped in solid metals and sure the fuzz scares the crapola out of me but isn't it wonderful when you're just cruizing around, listening to music. or when you are sitting in the back seat and you've got 3 of your best pals and you guys are looking for trouble and/or ice cream with the windows down and the music up?

lets share a memory, shall we?

the facts: summer, 2008.
the background: School had just ended, graduation was over, summer heat was here.
the music: man man, the east clubbers, basically noel's techno and julieanne's indie
the scene: summer was in full blast and people were throwing bbqs/bday parties/just hanging out at homes and, as i usually do, i over thought about what to wear and whether or not i should bring a tray of brownies. (i did, big success). i was so nervous, and considered not even going, since i was hanging out with these cool older kids and, as a sophomore, i was thrilled! (still am thrilled!). ended up going and we had a blast. we went from hanging out at one house to another house back to original house and it was wonderful. the night ended (and this i will never forget) with a few people going to montclair to get ice cream, which was closed. it was beautiful, let me tell you, the sky was that wonderful misty grey with the splashes of summer reds/oranges/yellows/pinks turning to purples and blues and wearing a dress was not a problem with the wonderful dry heat that i love. i'll never forget how windy it was, all the windows were rolled down (by hand!) and the music was wonderful and we all sat in a mutual and calm silence just taking it in.
ever since then i love driving with all the windows down.

i had so much fun. i can't wait for summer.

Did you feel the change in temperature and in mood? If you have driven a car, have you felt the warm summer/spring air instead of the chilly wind?

I wore shorts today. I walked home today. I walked home today in a dress. I feel so happy that warm days are returning, that the sun is staying around for longer and I feel that there is much to accomplish this summer. I also feel that I can do it all, whatever it is. Its going to be good but also it's going to be changing so fast but its going to be good. I will be sure of it.

I MUST CONTINUE TO ENJOY THE DAY, goodbye!

"How often have I lain beneath rain on a strange roof, thinking of home."

I am writing a 5 page paper due to tomorrow. I had 2 weeks to complete it. I spent most of the day watching British Murder Mysteries with my mother. And now I am paying for it.

English Essays: its not like they are hard for me to do, I just find the focusing extremely difficult. To stay on task for paragraph after paragraph, heck sentence after sentence without reverting to blogger or bubble spinner, jeezlouise, thats the main task.

Maybe I have ADD.

On another note (ADD kicking in??????), the above quote is my favorite from the novel. Makes me wish summer was here again, and I could experience it right this moment, preferably with a nice sun shower as well. I can't wait.