6.24.2009

do you believe in destiny? in fate? or in chance meetings? what about love? sure these words are thrown around and not taken seriously but something makes me wonder about them. there is no defined answer for any of these. for love, its when you have butterflies in your stomach or a rapid heart beat. the best one has to be: "when you're in love, you'll just know". for someone not in love, thats the worst thing to hear, asking "BUT HOW DO YOU KNOW?"
what has sparked these thoughts? graduation and this year's yearbook. the first page is filled with a little thing called chance. there are 7 continents, about 195 countries in the world, 50 states, 21 counties in NJ, and hundreds of towns to live in. but by some grace, you have landed in either little falls, totowa or west paterson. who says your best friend is the best person you'll ever meet? how is it that the person who knows you best, makes you laugh and supports you when you cry just happened to be in the same town or near by? its wonderful we've all found best friends but couldn't we do the same, say, if we were in missouri? canada? whats the chance you meet the person who has stolen your heart in one of your high school classes? this is complete craziness people!
chance is so undependable yet it is everywhere and we build our lives around it. coincidences? miracles? call it what you may, its everything and nothing at the same time. you walk down the hallway and of 1,000 plus kids, you just happen to see the boy you have a crush on? and what about meeting again, after moving apart? i've read (what a creep!) that there is a "love destiny" inwhich love brings together and pulls apart people. i don't neccessarily (spelling?) believe in this but its a comfortable thought. just think, the person you felt so deeply for might just return. its a nice la-la land situation. i'm no realist, nor do i live in illusions but somewhere in the middle, where sometimes reality is just too crazy and you need to think of a better world. but meeting again, thats a nice thought. would you still be crazy for the other person? and what if the other person had moved on. here you are, an awkward second meeting, with a lop-sided relationship. the world works in mysterious ways.
so what is my conclusion? i'll pull a trick like those shows that are sometimes on the discovery channel or history channel "Is there really a loch ness monster?" and say "we dont know right now, could be, could not be. we'll tell you later, just keep watching" and say i know nothing more about love or destiny or chance meetings than i did before, only now i just feel a little sad. so congrats class of 2009, enjoy it while it lasts,





whatever IT is.

6.21.2009

another day another dollar

i didn't know you could have titles! so here we are, we are here. another summer of talking with people about doing fantastic things and then never carrying them out. so be it. i find i have more fun waiting and anticipating the action then actually doing it. summer will be an exciting time, and i'll be sure to dish it all out to you, all 2 of you that is. so what do i want to do for the summer months?

sleep in to at least 10!
join a swimming pool and stick with it!
do that internship (i hope it will be fun)!
discover a lot more music or at least really listen to it!
drive more and become more comfortable (plus get a new iPod adapter, the one i have stinks)!
movie nights (no ifs, ands or buts)!
spend as much time as possible with my grandparents!
that fashion blog michelle was talking about!
actually get a tan!
summer work (i made a list of deadlines and i really want to adhere to them)!
day trips to NYC (walking, reading, shopping, getting lost)!
more blogging (this is fun)!
read books (sooo many)!
dude fastfood runs with tala!
weird NJ trip!
just chilllllllllll!

also:
college stuff, but this one gets no ! because i dont want to do this.

how exciting!

6.18.2009

Sunshine, Sunshine Is Fine.
I can't wait. It seems like it took forever to get here and now that it's here, it doesn't feel like it. This rain, this chill is pushing back my full enjoyment of summer. But don't you know, when its overly hot, I'll be the first one to say something like "I WISH IT WAS RAINING!". Oh Fickle Man! I've been able to quickly put outfits together these days. Today was a black, grey, white and yellow outfit that actually worked. I'll probably wear it on Monday or Tuesday, whichever is the more gross day. I went shopping with my mom the other day and picked out some nice skirts, can't wait to be able to use them. I've made a vow, FYI, which states the skirts will be worn at least 4 days out of 7 days. (Dresses may be worn as well) I would like to buy a sash, a large sun hat and a few more choice items that will truly make the outfit. Also, I made specific dates by which certain summer work pieces shall be done. I MUST ABIDE BY THIS! must go and finish studying/planning tomorrows outfit!

6.17.2009

The Last Day of School. well, technically.

I am undecided on how I feel. This is the day I've been looking forward to this entire year. I should be estatic, jumping for joy, making plans. But I'm sitting here feeling a bit sorry that another year went by and how time is just slipping away. Oh well. No use crying over spilled milk, or something like that. Does that even fit? ahaha, oh well. Maybe I'd like to be on the other side of the fence for after we've graduated, cause this side is getting too sad for me! Today in my 8th period class, this one senior guy was just streching and I noticed he already looked like a college guy. That young, high school boy had left. I guess you just have to go with the flow.

My friend Mike just sent me a picture of a guy in a band and you know whats strange? How we all look different. How everything we are like, we look like, we sound like, we like, are all in these cells. This guy's eyes were nice, blue and clear. And my cat sitting and looking at me is all black and furry and sweet all because of a chance meeting of his parents back in paterson. I guess what I'm talking about for this whole long entry, is that most of our lives depend on chance which is such an undependable thing in itself, don't you think? I mean who we marry and spend the rest of our lives depends on some sort of random meeting, maybe getting into the same class or college, maybe just seeing eachother on the bus. Heck, my life depended on my mother going to Russia and deciding to stay 4 years instead of just 1. And now, the graduating class of 2009 will go out and make their own mistakes that will eventually lead to major decisions. This reminds me of The Domino Theory (well kind of, only minus the whole country aspect, more like one thing leads to another) or maybe like Final Destination.

6.15.2009

So this is a blog, huh? In case you're wondering, I just wanted some sort of connection to the outside world because Twitter is not working out so nicely. Oh this auto-saves! Nifty! So what will I put into my blog you are wondering? (Yes, I'm talking towards you, Jasco!) Well, anything I want - take that society! I'll tell you about myself and tell you about what I'm listening, in case you go home wondering that. I'm listening to Fleet Foxes currently. So, yes. This isn't as excited as I was hoping, maybe it'll pick up! SO! Why the name? Why "Confessions From The Girl Who Took Your Cat"? Well, I like cats but I don't steal them. Honestly, I jacked it from my top 3 bands (there may be more, but right now its down to three), "Flowers From The Man Who Shot Your Cousin". BTW, whats up with the record stores who don't sell his album?! I mean, iTunes does, but it's the "Clean" Version. Whats the point?!
Well this has gone on for long enough, I must dash to think of something witty to put into my profile. See Ya!

Are you still wondering what my top 3 bands are? If you are they are Pink Floyd, Flowers... and Atmosphere. Go ahead, judge me!