11.24.2010

i keep having this dream. no, not like a sleep dream, though sometimes i dream about my dream, but its more like day dreams - just thinking of the possibilities. would you like to hear it? okay, well. prepare yourself, its kind of a hipster's dream. i know, i know. hopefully i can translate all my dreams to you, im not so sure myself but im listening to devendra banhart so im channelling my inner hipster.


first off, lets say that i really dont think im a hipster. im saying this, not because im a hipster trying to either a) sound modest or b) be all cool and deny my hipster ness/ "only cans have labels" it up because i guess i kind of am a hipster but really, im not as hard core as a traditional hipster is. i mean, ive got vintage pieces but im as serious as the others. and also, i wanted to be a sorority girl, i mean really, what self respecting hipster does that? so lets just agree to disagree that although i have hipster points, im not as hard core as the rest of the hipster population.

okay, now that thats out of the way, this is how i feel. (maybe this will make me a hipster?) i feel restless. there it is. i mean, i am over 1000 miles away but i feel like there is so much i havent done and i am getting all antsy to do it. id really love do something that i would be super pleased with, like join a band. you know? i do some fun things down here, but after evaluating everything, it just seems so mundane. i dont think im getting everything out of college, you know? i cant wait for next semester so i can make more friends and do something. i want to meet more people and have more adventures like hiking and road tripping. i think thats the major one - id love to road trip and sort of figure it out as we went along. i sound so crazy. what is wrong with me? i think it would be exhilerating to sort of panic a bit and ride with the gas tank on low and live in that purple palace with a friend. give up stability for the unknown, NONSENSE! i know. and i wouldnt do it, cause im a big scardy cat but i would like to take that roadtrip. ive talked about a roadtrip with one guy and id love to get a group together to go to bonnaroo and meet up with my possible future roommate there, shes from san antonio so we would all meet there. thats my favorite part of summer, all the driving with the windows down and im real sad to see that over. i dont know, i guess its the little rebel in me that wants that sort of unknown life. i sound spoiled, oh who am i kidding, i am!

when i was visiting new orleans, we ate at a restaurant that overlooked a little four corner place and, looking up, there were two apartments that i was suuuuper interested in. one side lived a group of people - boys and girls with scraggly hair and tattoos and dirty feet and what i saw really made me a creepy staring girl. like they all just sort of sat out on their terrance and watched the people below and played music and smoked (i wouldnt do that but everything else - yes please!) and the other apartment had beautiful white windows all open with sheer white curtains blowing in the wind, it was all so hip with a modern twist and i loved it. the man who lived in there had a dog and, being a creeper!, i saw him take his dog for a walk and shortly after he was back with a baguette under his arm, i mean how cool! 4

i just want to roam and see everything, god, i sound so whiny rich kid-ish, im sorry y'all.

you know how people are like: "before we lived in our mansion, we lived in a tiny one room apartment in the ghetto and it was the happiest moment of our lives"? well i guess i want that. that sort of struggle you know? i guess what im trying to say is that i want that experience of scrambling together things, making the best out of the worst, taking one day at a time to appriciate success and what i have now. i mean ive never had to feel that and i really dont want to grow up having everything drop in my lap. i am grateful for the things i have and for the people that i love but im not as grateful as i could be, do you know what i mean? ive never not had, so what i do have is just the usual for me. i dont know.


in other news i may or may not be living in a purple palace apartment with my friend L. if this were to happen you can bet banhart's "pray for the other person's happiness" would be playing on repeat (as well as 90's classics) and we joke that we would spend all our money on anthropology doorknobs. that is our priority and we are sticking to it. i dont know man, i wouldnt want to get a bed, so i would like to go the minimalist and sleep on an airmattress on the floor. i mean, it sounds crazy, but it also sounds slightly intriguing, right? and there are nice air mattresses out there! well i think that living in the so-dubbed "purple palace" would be the beginning of my adventure. another part of the dream would be to begin to blog a little more seriously. oh jeez, now we know i am crazy. but there are so many interesting people in my classes and i see so many interesting people on campus. i really hate that i cant know everyone from my school. i really like picking people's brains (figurativly) and learning about them and i just love to talk. lets face it, i do. and i would be honored to share it with other people on campus. i mean, i would want to know if the random boy in my class is a fencing artist who won awards for his sculptures. i think it would make college feel a lot less like a singular journey. now we're getting somewhere. so my dream would include me interviewing people for their stories, stopping people and taking pictures of their outfits, talking to the professors about themselves. im curious to know these people that i share the university with and there must be others as well.


anywhoooo ive got to go do important things or something like that. so happy thanksgiving and to all a good night. right?

1 comment:

  1. Looove this post. Can't say anymore - that would be spilling my guts. Hope you had a happy Thanksgiving down there...

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